You Could Have Had Me Forever
I woke up sticky with sweat in a hammock next to the lake. The sun was going down slowly and you were walking around lighting up the tiki torches and citronella candles. Watching you move in the fading sunlight made me smile to the fading sunlight. You were wearing that stupid t-shirt that I always told you I hated, but secretly I really did love it. It was green and faded and had holes along the bottom hem. I knew that there were exactly 5 holes in that hem, but I’d never tell you that I counted them.
You jeans were dark washed and had a hole above the knee on your right leg from the time you caught it on a loose nail walking through the door on my screen porch. The hole on the knee of the left leg was from playing drunken softball with your brothers and you tried to slide into home base.
You were smoking a Marlboro, or cowboy killers as I liked to call them, and walking around the edge of the lake setting little torches to light with a blue bic lighter. The lighter had D&S written in black Sharpie on the bottom. I knew this because I wrote this on the bottom of all my lighters so I could tell when you stole one from me.
I looked at the cabin. The lights were on and the music was playing. I knew Jesse was up because Zeppelin was playing and he was a sucker for Zeppelin. I heard the low rumble of what must have been the blender and instantly knew Rita was in there too. She must have driven up to the lake when I was taking my nap because she wasn’t there when I fell asleep.
The opening riffs of ‘When The Levee Breaks’ flooded the air as the sliding door opened up onto the deck of the cabin. I could hear the boys singing and Rita laughing that big belly laugh of hers that always made me smile.
I yelled something about making me a drink and tried to get out of the hammock. I knew before I even looked up that you were watching me. It felt like I had touched a live wire when I knew those blue-green eyes were on me.
I arched my back on purpose and pretended I didn’t know you were there. You walked over and called me ‘trouble’. I made my very best completely innocent face and laid back in the hammock.
You gave the whole thing a big push and I gripped the sides and laughed with glee. I could smell the smoke from the candles and your cigarettes every time it swung close to you. I asked you to carry me inside because my shoes were on the deck and I didn’t want to get my feet dirty. You muttered about me being more trouble than I was worth and then kissed me like you hadn’t seen me in days as you scooped me up. Your lips tasted like tobacco and salt. You could have had me forever.
I stole your red Wayfarers off your face and put them on while sticking my tongue out at you as you ran up onto the deck cradling me in front of you. You literally threw me at Jesse who caught me like he was cradling a football until I squirmed my way back to standing.
“Say it,” I demanded as I sipped what can only be described as a very salty, very strong margarita. You grabbed my face and with one hand slid my stolen sunglasses down to the bridge of my nose. My blue eyes were bloodshot from too little sleep, and too much tequila but your eyes were red too.
“You’re a PUNK,” you said in that gravely voice that meant you’d been smoking too much.
I laughed and threw my arms out wide and spun around in circles til I was dizzy. You grabbed my waist mid-spin so I came to a halt facing you. The wooden planks of the deck were warm under my bare feet, the wood still radiating the heat from the sun. I buried my face in that stupid green shirt and you rested your chin on the top of my head.
I could have stayed there forever. Then you whispered “I love you” into my tangled blond hair, and I knew that you could too.
